An Islamic scholar, Ustaz Sa’eed AbdurRauf says many marriages collapse these days because the foundations are not based on the fear of Allah.

He stated this in Ibadan at a Public Lecture organised by Oyo District of The Criterion, an association of Muslim women in business and the professions.

Ustaz AbdurRauf said misunderstanding is normal in marriages but if the relationships had been built on the fear of Allah, it would not escalate to the point of collapse rather it would be managed.

“We should build our relationship on the fear of Allah. If the couple have the fear of Allah, every other thing will be in order. They should worship Allah together, they should live in peace for the sake of Allah and they should love each other for the sake of Allah”.

The Islamic scholar listed factors responsible for collapsed marriages to include marital finance, polygamy, and lack of romance as marriages grow.

“Marital finance is usually caused by the husband’s inability to provide for home because when a man is incapable, this creates a lot of problems at home and it becomes worse if the woman is the one providing for the home”.

“In the Muslim circle, there is another one that has to do with polygamy. I think it’s the right time that women try to live with polygamy. Man is polygamous animal, there is nothing we can do about it”.

“Another problem is the issue of romance. Some believe that when a woman is growing old that she should be deprived of romance, which is virtually wrong. We as Muslims we believe that from the commencement of the marriage till the end of the relationship when either of the couple dies romance should always be exciting in the home front”.

Earlier, the Amirah of The Criterion, Alhaja Falilat Olatunji said the lecture was organised to address how marriages could survive stressing that misunderstanding is a natural phenomenon which should not degenerate into a separation of couples.

“In Criterion, we hold passion in the family being a strong unit in the society because what comes out of it will affect the larger society.

The target is to make home a perfect or near-perfect one so that what comes out of such a relationship will be based on love, harmony and service to Allah. We are tired of collapsed marriages all because of little misunderstandings”

Members of the men wing of the Association “The Companion” led by the Amir, Alhaji Abdulwaheed Raji were also in attendance.

 The theme of the lecture is “Resolving the Challenges of Modern Day Muslim Marriages”.

Ridwan Fasasi

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