Pastor in charge of Christ Heritage Ministry, Eleyele, Sango Road, Ibadan, Mrs Adesola Morakinyo has advised parents to shun acts capable of jeopardizing the future of their children.
Pastor Morakinyo stated this while leading the Children’s Department of the church on an excursion to the Broadcasting House, Radio Nigeria, Dugbe, Ibadan.
Pastor Morakinyo represented by the head of the Children Unit of the church, Mrs Mary Adebayo, admonished parents to be proactive and desist from entrusting their responsibilities to friends or neighbours.
She said the church considered Radio Nigeria for the excursion due to its pace-setting role in broadcast journalism as well as to give the children requisite career exposure.
Some of the children including Victoria Olabisi, Joshua Onuorah, Victory Aderibigbe, while speaking with our reporter, said the opportunity given them had further sharpened their career decisions in life.
They advised parents and religious leaders to adopt children’s excursions as part of the regular activities of the church
As I began to write this piece, I remembered the true life story of a young man who had a miserable life.
He tried all efforts to rise from the muddy waters of life, but kept on sinking. However, he was not silent.
Life wasn’t pleasant for him at all. It kept presenting him bile and he was at the verge of giving up when he met a Pastor. He narrated his ordeal and the Pastor prayed for him.
However, while praying, the Spirit of the Lord told the Pastor to tell the young man to go and plead with his mother to bless him: for the mother was said to have uttered a curse upon him while he was younger .
Thank God, he obeyed.He met his mother and she reversed the curse and blessed him.
In less than two months after, the young man rose from obscurity to lime light.The once rejected, poverty stricken, sorrowful and perplexed man became a force to reckon with.
Coming back from this story, I pondered ” How many glorious destinies had been ruined by utterances from parents!”
The tongue as little as it is among the parts of the body, carries both life and death, but, what it releases is dictated or controlled by man in whose mouth lies the tongue.
It is very disturbing that many parents, at the slightest provocation, habitually rain torrents of curses on their children, unknown to them that, the effects of curses do not manifest early in life.
Unfortunately, it might just be the time that such parents are to be enjoying the fruits of their labour over their children that echoes of the curses will start manifesting in their children’s life, just as it happened to that young man.
Dad, Mum, Uncle, Aunt, truth be told, ‘Words are powerful!
Curses are evil pronouncement which usually have negative effect upon the bearer. Sadly, this is a habit that is common among some parents. Curses flow freely on their lips to the extent that some would say that their children will not prosper. Yet such parents want to reap the fruits of their labour.
This is the very reason you as a parent must tame your tongue and watch your pronouncements upon your children.
Cursing your child is like labouring for something and using the same hand to pull it down.
This is the reason God frowns at raining curses.
“Out of the same mouth proceeds blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so”.
James 3;10
Uttering verbal abuse which has in it curses, is an ill wind capable of distorting a child’s destiny because God has placed you as an authority over that child. Therefore, your tongue has a great impact on your child and the more reason you should be mindful of the way you use it.
A renowned writer, Liza Blau, agreed that cursing a child could give the child emotional trauma, lead to low self esteem, birth a feeling of frustration or anger. “She might internalize your hostility, leading her to feel worthless and unlovable. Cursing can also leaves your kid confused and unclear about what she did wrong, because it isn’t honest or healthy communication”.
Due to the imitative nature of children, a child that is constantly exposed to cursing might also unconsciously begin to imbibe the same culture which he displays among his friends in school or neighborhood.
While curses may have physiological effect, the spiritual effect is more devastating as the child may just be battling with unexplainable issues in life.
Though, children may misbehave sometimes, parents should as much as possible avoid evil pronouncements, no matter how angry they are. Your Words are like seeds waiting for the appropriate time to germinate for you to harvest.
However, children should also avoid actions that could provoke their parents to invoke curses on them.
We are now in the age and times when we may really need to unmask the truth of whose responsibility is the child, Government, Society or Parents.
Today, some parents blame the teacher for every one of their children’s failures. Society also shares part of it and the government is not exempted.
Statements such as “that teacher is not performing his/her duty very well, see what the society has turned our children to, our government is not helping our children at all ” are now freely and commonly expressed by some parents due to the shortcomings in their children’s academic performance or behavioural pattern.
We may however need to counter these statements with the following questions; Who is to blame when the child refuses to do his homework ( a work that is expected to be done at home), and which keeps piling up? Must the teacher be blamed when a mother decides to do the assignment for her child rather than to guide him/ her through it?
Also, who is to blame when a child watches sensual films with his parents? Then when the boy attempts to have carnal knowledge of a mate, who is of the opposite sex, is the teacher also responsible?
Oh, we may as well ask, if it is the government that teaches a child to be unruly and bully other mates in school, dress in tattered uniform, wear crazy haircuts, with vulgar expressions gushing out of the lips without caution.
While we do not deny the fact that the teacher, society or environment, and government fall under secondary influencers when it comes to child development, parents still remain the major stakeholders in terms of child care, training and overall development.
From infancy, a child is welcomed into the hands of a father and mother and grows under their tutelage until maturity. Even a child born outside wedlock has a father and mother.
However, someone may argue that what about children who are orphans? The truth is even an orphan is handed over to a caregiver in a family or orphanage. The case of a set of twin brothers comes to mind. Their mother died during their birth and the father took to heels realising they were twins. Perhaps, for fear of responsibility, only God knows. These twin brothers were raised by their maternal grandmother and today, one is a successful lawyer and the other a doctor.
Children who are used for rituals, abandoned at birth either under the bridge, beside the river, on refuse dumps or in most unimaginable places as reported in the news, have the hands of one or both parents.
Psychologist, Sigmund Freud posited that personality forms during the first few years of life and that how parents and other caregivers interact with children has a long-lasting impact on children’s emotional state.
Another research corroborated this by saying that a personality formed by the age of six or seven is not likely to deviate from its core.
Therefore, parents must realise that the formative years of a child must not be joked with and it begins from the home, just like the age-long proverb, “Charity begins at home”. At this early stage, all the senses of the child imbibe consciously or unconsciously from elements around him, of which the parents are key. As the child grows, all he has absorbed begins to manifest and the picture gets bigger by the day.
If there is no solid foundation for that child during his formative years, he or she will be swayed by the wind of abnormalities in his environment. It is like building a house on a shaky foundation Such will easily crumble amid storms.
This is not to exempt other stakeholders who are the teachers and government. As a teacher, you are to make and not mar them through impactful teachings. So, a case where a teacher is found defiling his/her pupil is appalling and highly unacceptable.
Government, on its part, must be seen to uphold the Child Rights Act(2023). 24 out of 36 states of Nigeria have adopted the CRA as a state law. Therefore, twelve (12) states in Nigeria have yet to adopt the CRA in their laws of the 36 states of the federation.
Needlessly is, therefore, trading blame when it comes to whose responsibility is the child’s. The truth be told; you carry the major responsibility as a parent because you are given the child directly by God.
“If you can light the spark of curiosity in a child, they will learn without any further assistance, very often. Children are natural learners”- Sir Ken Robinson
Elizabeth is a six year old primary one pupil. When she is at school, her mother misses her presence and when she is back from school, her mom prefers school hours are not over.
Reason for this is that Elizabeth will keep her mother’s company with series of intelligent questions and her mother would patiently give her answers to her satisfaction.
The little girl would again ask more questions from the provided answers to the extent her mother would not hesitate to stop her from asking further questions.
During outside engagements, her mother would had warned her against asking questions but Elizabeth would continue to ask questions as soon as they board a vehicle.
Elizabeth says asking questions quenches her thirst
“I like asking many questions until I am satisfied”
This act of Elizabeth is known as inquisitiveness otherwise known as intellectual curiosity.
It is the joy of every parent to have their children excel in their chosen fields and prior to their secondary or higher education, these children exhibit many traits including inquisitiveness.
Children are born explorers and as babies, they use some innate mechanisms to make sense of the world around them. Their manner of talking and asking questions is their way of fuelling their never-ending curiosity.
According to research, children may want to establish contact with adulthood or see clues to build their own opinions on issues.
African Proverb “You do not tell a child not to touch a hot lamp, the lamp will tell him”
A chat with some children in Ibadan confirms this; Child 1: “If I don’t know something, I like to be asking my mommy questions so that I can know it” Child 2: “I ask questions on what I don’t understand” Child 3: “Yes, I do ask questions from my parents and they always answer my questions”
Two mothers speak on intellectual curiosity in their children
Mother 1: “Yes, I do answer them, because they may go and ask the question from another person and they may give them wrong answers, which can mislead them”
Mother 2: “First, it seems convenient to answer questions but out of that answer, they would still ask you another question, from that answer again they will ask another question”
Experts speak on intellectual curiosity in children An educationist, Mrs Bosede Ajanaku pointed out that parents should always encourage inquisitiveness in their children because the answers can broaden their horizon.
Speaking on the issue, a psychologist, Dr Solomon Ojo advised parents to inculcate in their children reading culture, to sharpen their curiosity and stressed the need for parents not to shun questions from their children so as not to kill their desire to seek knowledge.
Also, showing them the world, through travelling, going to camps, museums and mixing with another culture, would equally nurture and develop children’s curiosity.
Parents should as well spend more time with their children together as a family and going for a walk, cooking together and playing games together.
Another form of encouraging intellectual curiosity in children is by asking open-ended questions and use words like who, what, when, where, why and how, and ask for their thoughts first before providing answers to their questions.
Finally, let children be children, by allowing them to be curious and explore, parents and elders around teach them confidence and appreciation. Dr Ojo added that curiosity always open doors, and will lead children to new and exciting paths full of adventure and learning.
Human rights lawyer and activist, Femi Falana (SAN), has called on the National Assembly to address Nigeria’s worrisome out-of-school crisis to save the future of the country.
Falana made the call in a speech he read at a summit on Nigeria’s out-of-school crisis, hosted by the UK charity IA Foundation in Lagos at the weekend.
The activist said that the refusal of state governments to make counterpart contributions to the Universal Basic Education Fund in the country was hampering access to basic education in Nigeria.
A 2022 UNESCO report said that approximately 20 million children are out of school in Nigeria, which is Africa’s most populous nation.
Falana, in his speech, made available to the press in Abuja on Sunday, stressed the need for the National Assembly to act fast, lamenting that the number of out-of-school children in the country was alarming.
According to him, pursuant to Section 2 of the Compulsory Free Universal Basic Education Act, it is important for the state governments to make counterpart contributions to the Universal Basic Education Fund, which has continually been ignored.
The activist argued that the National Assembly should ensure an amendment of the constitution to empower the accountant-general of the federation to deduct the counterpart fund payable by every state government from its source.
“In June last year, the Executive Secretary of the Universal Basic Education Commission, Mr Hamid Bobboyi, bemoaned the refusal of state governments to provide counterpart funding and access the annual matching grants given by the commission to develop their basic education system.
“The commission was particularly concerned that about N110 billion of the intervention funds accessed from UBEC were not utilised by the states in 2021, with the money left in the coffers of State Universal Basic Education Boards.
“Sometime in 2017, we learnt that the Federal Government had decided to refund state governments all monies so far deducted from their accounts to meet the London Paris Club obligations.
“We were able to convince the Federal Government to deduct the counterpart fund that the state governments had failed to contribute to the Universal Basic Education Fund.
“The suggestion was accepted by the Federal Government and that was how the sum of N71.3 billion was deducted from source and remitted to the account of UBEC.
“Thereafter, UBEC added the matching grant of N71.3 billion and the states received a total of N142.6bn for the provision of needed facilities in public primary and junior secondary schools in the country.
“What the National Assembly should do is to address the refusal of state governments to make counterpart contributions to the Universal Basic Education Fund pursuant to Section 2 of the Compulsory Free Universal Basic Education Act.’’
According to him, the National Assembly should, as a matter of urgency, ensure the amendment of the constitution to empower the accountant-general of the federation to deduct the counterpart fund payable by every state government from its source.
Falana explained further that since each of the 36 states of the federation had adopted the Child’s Rights Act and enacted a Child’s Rights Law, it had become the joint responsibility of the federal, state and local governments to ensure that every Nigerian child was given an opportunity to acquire free and compulsory education.
He added that the Discrimination Against Persons With Disabilities (Prohibition) Act of 2019 guaranteed free education up to senior secondary school level for every person with a disability.
“In the same vain, all public schools, whether primary, secondary or tertiary shall have at least one personnel trained to cater for the educational development of persons with disabilities or special facilities for the effective education of persons with disabilities.
“These laws have been observed in their breach because the members of the political class, drawn from all registered political parties have not demonstrated any commitment to the education of every child in Nigeria.
“The members of the legislative and executive organs of governments have failed to appreciate the danger of having 18.5 million out-of-school children, the highest in the world.
“Therefore, amending the Compulsory Free Universal Basic Education Act to make it more stringent for parents will not work in a poverty-stricken environment,” Falana said.
Olaitan Oye-Adeitan in this piece writes on indulgence as a breeding ground for incorrigibility among children.
Perhaps, we should ask, how did we get to this point? How did all these begin, that a child will have the effrontry to frame up a teacher just because the teacher scolded him for a misbehaviour in school? The child was only asked to stand up in class for disturbing, as a minor punishment, only for him to complain to his mother that his body was seriously aching because he claimed the teacher canned and insulted him. In anger, the mother stormed the school and vented her anger on the teacher, raging profusely.
The experience of another teacher also comes to mind, as a student lied against her just because she enforced discipline. It was discovered that the student had a chat book, where she wrote all manners of unbelievable things whenever the teacher was in the class. Rather than listen in class, she conversed with her book of ‘mischief’, until the teacher caught her one day.
Should we also talk about the experience of a primary school teacher, who was assaulted to the point of death by the parents of a Primary One pupil at a school in Ibadan, the Oyo State capital, for canning the pupil who was found to have written answers on his laps during exams? But for the saving grace of God, the teacher would have lost her life in the hands of these parents.
Recently, there was the report of a school teacher at a secondary school at Agbor, in Delta State, who was attacked on the school premises by the father of a student, disciplined for misconduct. Eventually, the teacher died.
Numerous are the examples of high level of indiscipline among children and culpability of parents taking sides with their wards over actions they should have been well scolded for. It is a dangerous thing for a child in her formative years to be made to see the immoral, abnormal as acceptable and normal way of life.
Dangling the carrot and sparing the rod is not in any way ideal for child training and development. We are now in a society where some parents are controlled by their kids, with the parents even defending what shouldn’t be defended at all. There are some actions that are to the detriment of the child’s health.
For instance, a woman once took her ill daughter to hospital. After consultations, the doctor recommended some drugs to be administered to the child. But , the mother said the child would not take the particular tablet from her, and declined giving the child the prescribed drug despite the doctor’s suggestion, not until her husband told her that he would know how to ensure their daughter took the drug.
I have also heard, some parents, especially mothers utter statements such as ” I can’t allow anyone to cain my child oo.I knew what I faced on the day of delivery.
Such mindset is the reason some parents fight or abuse their children’s teachers or anyone who tries to scold them for their misbehaviour, forgetting that sparing the rod bakes a spoilt brat who in turn would become a trouble to the home and society.
Some mothers are equally in the habit of indulging their kids when being punished for an offence by their fathers rather than speaking with one voice to correct that child.
This among other factors accounts for increasing level of moral decadence, youthful exhuberance and juvenile delinquency.
Parents who are guilty of this should realise that loving a child is not in pampering and providing all material needs but also requires enforcing appropriate discipline when the child errs, in love.
A child that is left to go away with what he should be punished for will grow up believing, that is the normal way of life .And like the Yoruba adage, ” Ati kekere lati peka iroko, to ba dagba tan, ebo ni yio gba lowo eni, meaning .a stitch in time saves nine.
Birth pains, struggles encountered while raising a child, the soft spot you have or special instructions attached to the destiny of that child should not debar parents from inculcating discipline in a child.
One unarguable truth we must remember is that, children are gifts of God to families and a such, they are divine assignments in the hands of custodians. Like the Holy Scriptures instructs, “Train your child in the way of the Lord, when he grows up, he will not depart from it”.
If this instruction is neglected, then the child is vulnerable to being trained by the ‘World.’
Gbenga and Wura(Pseudo names) are siblings.However, for about ten years, their relationship was estranged due to hostilities stemming from their parents’ favouring Wura over Gbenga who is the elder brother.
They both lived in the same house, yet they weren’t greeting each other.Gbenga exhibited so much hatred for Wura,while Wura disrespected her brother even in the presence of her friends, a situation that compounded the problem.
The stiffness in this family tie lingered till they became adults and after the demise of their father. It was so bad that attempt by a relative to settle the rift did not yield the desired result. Gbenga said categorically, “no one could settle what their parents caused.”
While there’s the natural tendency for a child to win the heart of a parent or both, not every parent has been able to manage the feelings.
This life story tells of how as parents, you may be inadvertently fostering rivalry among your children by displaying favouritism as also revealed in the experiences of other children captured in their different excerpts.
Expressions such as “Oh!, that’s my girl, you won’t be like your sister or brother, Can’t you see that your brother/ sister behaves better than you or is more brilliant than you?” are all indicative of parental favouritism. The truth is, kids can be so intuitive about the presence of favouritism in their family.
Parental favoritism can create an environment of inequality and resentment among siblings.
Psychologists say, unfavored children may experience negative emotions, depression leading to withdrawal, develop low self-esteem and nurse the feeling of incompetency, sadness,anger, hatred, jealousy, throughout their lives due to lack of parental affirmation and affection.
On the other hand, a child that is endeared to the parent may develop an overbearing attitude and disrespect other siblings, moving around with so much pride.
These feelings can fester over time, forming the foundation for generational hostility that can permeate adult lives.
Generational hostility stemming from parental favoritism isn’t confined to childhood. As children grow into adults, the bitterness they harbor can manifest in strained family gatherings, passive-aggressive behavior, and even estrangement. The cycle may continue as they, in turn, unknowingly exhibit favoritism in their own parenting styles.
Unfortunately, the effects ripple through the lives of family members, creating emotional scars that can echo across generations, influencing interpersonal relationships and overall well-being of individuals and family life.
Due to the consequences of parental favouritism, it is necessary that the cycle be broken before generations unborn catches the strange fire.
Therefore, parents should open conversations within the family to help in understanding how each member feels and foster empathy.
Engage in activities that bring the family together. Shared memories and experiences can help bridge the gap between generations and mend old wounds.
Family therapy or counseling can also provide a safe space to address underlying issues and rebuild strained relationships
As parents,do not praise or encourage only one child. Learn to treat them equally with the help of God to nurture healthier relationships that span generations. Through this, we can work towards creating a more harmonious and supportive family environment that would be sustained well after we may have departed the world.
Join me next week,for more on parenting.You can follow the author on Facebook Olaitan Oye-Adeitan.
A 15-year-old Sasha Kraynyuk has studied the photograph handed to him by Ukrainian investigators, as he recognised the boy dressed in Russian military uniform immediately.
The teenager sitting at a school desk has the Z-mark of Russia’s war emblazoned on his right sleeve, coloured in the red, white and blue of the Russian flag.
But the boy’s name is Artem, and he’s Ukrainian.
Sasha and Artem were among 13 children taken from their own school in Kupyansk, north-eastern Ukraine last September by armed Russian soldiers in balaclavas. Ushered onto a bus with shouts of “Quickly!”, they then disappeared for weeks without trace.
When the children, who all have special educational needs, were finally allowed to call home, it was from much deeper inside Russian-occupied territory.
To get them back, their relatives were forced to make gruelling journeys across thousands of miles into the country that has declared war on them.
Only eight of the children have been returned from Perevalsk so far and Artem was one of the last, collected by his mother just this spring.
When I reached the school’s director by phone, she saw no problem with dressing Ukrainian children in the uniform of an invading army.
“So what?” Tatyana Semyonova retorted. “What can I do? What’s it to do with me?”
I countered that the Z symbolised the war against the children’s own country. “So what?” the director demanded again. “What kind of a question is that? No-one is forcing them.”
Ogun State Government says it will continue to implement programmes and policies tailored towards allowing the children to optimally realize their creative and productive potential.
Governor Dapo Abiodun stated this at the 2023 Children’s Day celebration held at the Nigerian Navy Secondary School, Onikooko, Abeokuta.
The Governor, who categorized children as the greatest asset for promoting strong and peaceful society, urged parents and guardians to spend quality times and pay more attention to the upbringing of their children.
Speaking on the theme of this year’s celebration “The State of the Nigeria Children Today, Proper Parenting for Value Reorientation and National Consciousness”, the Governor emphasized that moral decadence in the society could be linked to Neglect in good parenting.
This year’s Children day Celebration witnessed parade from public and private Primary and Secondary schools across the state as well as members of voluntary organisations.
Dignitaries at the occasion included the state Deputy Governor, Mrs Noimot Salako, Head of Service, Mr Kolawole Fagbohun, members of the just dissolved State Executive Councils, Body of Permanent Secretaries, among others.
The Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps, NSCDC Osun State Command, has advised students, particularly females, to always expose anybody that abuses them.
The Zonal Commander in charge of Zone J, Assistant Commandant General, Fasiu Adeyinka, gave the advice in Osogbo at the first anniversary of the Special Female Squad of NSCDC.
Represented by the Deputy Commandant of Corps, Sanusi Saliu, Mr Adeyinka noted that it was imperative for all to fight both external and internal forces that threaten the peaceful atmosphere in schools across the country.
Mr Adeyinka, who lauded the Commandant General for deeming it fit to establish the squad, described him as a true father who felt there was a need to put an end to kidnapping and banditry activities within and around schools across the country.
The State Commandant, Mr Sunday Agboola, represented by his second-in-command, Deputy Commandant of Corps, Adeoti Joseph, also commended the CG for the initiative, describing him as a visionary leader and a lover of children.
Noting that children are leaders of tomorrow, Mr Agboola said it was expedient to protect them from both internal and external attacks.
He said the establishment of the Special Female Squad was never by accident, saying that God knows the trained female officers have a special assignment in the development of the country.
In a lecture entitled, ‘Effects of Safe School on Gender-Base Violence, a Stakeholder Lola Way’, observed that a nation cannot experience peace if the rights of the female gender are wantonly abuse.
She called on children to break the silence when they are being violated, saying when you see something, say something and do something.
“Don’t prepare the road for your children, prepare your children for the road.”
Unknown
Saw this quote somewhere and it brings to mind something that has been giving me a little bit of worry about the next generation, and by that I mean most children aged 10 years and under.
I’ve noticed that a lot of us who are now parents (at least those born in the late 70s/early 80s are dropping the ball on raising children who can stand by themselves and can face basic adversity with minimal fuss.
In the name of making sure our children don’t “suffer the way we suffered”, we are raising children who have been so sheltered that they can’t do basic things like cross the road, organise, carry or even maintain their stuff by themselves, do basic household chores because we consider those things as beneath them.
Imagine a 15-year-old, almost 6-foot tall boy who can’t get himself to an examination centre less than 2km to the home alone, whose dad had to carry his examination credentials to the door of the exam hall for him all in the name of “he is careless and can lose it”, or a who doesn’t even know how to iron his own shirt cos, “he will burn it”, can’t or doesn’t even know how to polish his own shoes, can’t wash his own underwear well, I can go on and on.
I agree that knowing how to do all the above doesn’t guarantee success in life or isn’t a measure of success, but that’s part of the reasons we have a lot of lazy, non-productive and entitled young adults who drop out, quit jobs, end relationships, close shop and so on when faced with the slightest challenge with minimum resistance.
Your 4-5 year old child attempted to climb the stairs of like 3 steps and falls down once then you decide to make it an habit to carry him over every little obstacle, she trips while carrying a bowl of water, then you ban her from doing any chores in the house.
What you are drilling into the child’s head is that he/she isn’t capable, weak, fragile and should run from any opposition they encounter.
We are meant to be guides to these divine gifts and not be crutches for them to lean on as they trudge on through life.
We are supposed to be shoulders they can stand on to see and go far in life and not wheelchairs to wheel them through life.
No matter how strong, caring, rich, connected and devoted you are, you can’t always be there to defend, fend and assist your child all the days of his/her life.
As the bible says, `Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.‘ (Proverbs 22:6.).
We are supposed to be coaches, mentors, guides and role models to our children.
Have you ever seen a boxing/tennis/football coach enter the fray on behalf of their charge(s)?
So, teach your children to stand on their own feet, make their own decisions, live by their own convictions, of course you can always, teach, correct, advise, encourage and prompt them from time to time.
But make sure they a properly grounded and rounded in every area of life not only in their academics, let them learn proper social skills to enable them cope with other people from different backgrounds.
Teach them the law of cause and effect.
Teach them boundaries to enable them manage their appetites and avoid covetousness.
Teach them to respect elders and authority figures.
Teach them how to manage and take proper care of things, (they can start with their toys!)
Teach them that adversity, challenges and opposition are a normal part of life (it is how character is built!).
Teach them that although challenges and problems are going to arise in life, they are however not going to last forever.
Let them know that that’s how character is trained.
Above all, let them know God from an early age, teach them the power of faith and confession.
Model Christ consistently in all you do, the truth is that this current generation learns more by observation than by instruction.
Let there be conformity between what you say and what you do!
Don’t say or instruct one thing and do another!
Today’s children are more intuitive and observant than you can ever imagine!
The Lord will help us.
We will succeed as parents and our children will succeed in life in Jesus name.
Ogun state government has reaffirmed its administration’s determination to ensure that the state sustained its polio-free status.
The Commissioner for Health, Dr. Tomi Coker gave the assurance during the flag off ceremony of the First Round, Outbreak Response Exercise against Polio virus held at the Iberekodo Primary Health Centre, Abeokuta.
Dr Coker who was represented by the Permanent Secretary, Ministry of Health, Dr. Olukayode Oladeinde, said over two million children under the age of 0-59 months were targeted at during the exercise.
The Ogun state health commissioner who pointed that the outbreak of the Circulating Variant of Poliomyelitis virus in the country necessitated the exercise noted that the state in collaboration with Development Partners deemed it fit to tackle any form of the infection.
Also, the Executive Secretary, Primary Health Care Development Board, Dr. Elijah Ogunsola, who said that children of ages 0-59 months would be vaccinated with two drops of the Oral Polio Vaccine, OPV, maintained that the vaccines remained safe and potent.
In their separate messages, representative, National Team Lead for OBR1, Dr. Suleiman Haladu and the State Cordinator, World Health Organization WHO, Mrs Afolake Ogunlaja and her counterpart from the National Primary Health Care Development Agency, Dr Victoria Adebiyi said that the vaccines were safe and effective in protecting children against diseases, reiterating that their organizations remained committed to supporting the Ogun Government in all its healthcare programs aimed at ensuring the wellbeing of residents especially children.
Earlier, Chairman, Abeokuta North Local Government, Mr Abdul Sallam Adebayo represented by the Medical Officer of Health, Dr Oladipupo Afonja appreciated the present administration for the various health programmes and interventions, which he said, were focused on improving the wellbeing of children.
The Ondo State Police Command has arrested a 54year-old father, Mr Ojo Joseph for setting ablaze five of his step children at Fagun crescent area of Ondo town in Ondo State.
Reports say that, the man alleged that his wife who is the mother of the children offended him over a little misunderstanding.
It was further learnt that the father who was said to have poured petrol into the room of the children while asleep and set the kids on fire as one of them was burnt to death.
Four other victims currently are receiving treatment at Federal Medical Centre, Owo, while their mother and 18month-old twins escaped from inferno with minor injury.
Confirming the incident, the State Police Public Relations Officer, PPRO, Mrs Funmi Odunlami said the man had been apprehended by the police for a case of alleged arson and murder.
The PPRO said further that, investigation would be carried out before charging the suspect to court.
South Korean police say they have arrested a woman accused of murdering her two children who were found in suitcases in New Zealand last month.
In a case that shocked the country, the bodies were discovered by strangers who had bought abandoned suitcases from a storage unit in Auckland.
Korean police said, the bodies of the victims who were aged 7 and 10, were believed to have been stored for a few years.
New Zealand has applied for the woman’s extradition from South Korea.
Police in Auckland said they had worked closely with South Korean authorities in their search for the woman, after saying last month they believed she was in South Korea.
The woman had fled to South Korea in 2018 after the children’s deaths, South Korean police said. She is a 42-year-old New Zealand national of Korean descent.
A global Interpol warrant had been issued for her arrest. Officers arrested her on Thursday in a midnight raid on an apartment in the south-eastern city of Ulsan.
It followed a stakeout after investigators received tips about her whereabouts, Seoul’s National Police agency said.
Last month, New Zealand police said they were searching for the woman after they managed to identify the children, whose names have not been disclosed.
“To have someone in custody overseas within such a short period of time have all been down to the assistance of the Korean authorities and the coordination by our NZ Police Interpol staff,” said New Zealand Police Detective Inspector Tofilau Fa’amanuia Vaaelua on Thursday.
Police have requested the suspect be denied bail prior to her extradition to New Zealand where she faces murder charges.
Local media there reported the family had lived in Auckland for a few years and the children’s father had died of cancer prior to their deaths. They reported the children’s grandparents still live in New Zealand.
The children’s bodies were discovered in early August after a separate family bought a trailer-load of goods, including the suitcases, in an online auction.
According to officers, the family had no connection to the deaths and had suffered great distress in the period following the discovery.
Ignorantly, most parents in present-day society, handle their children in ways that could make them completely dependent on them such that the children would find it difficult to do things or take decisions on their own when they are capable of doing things for themselves.
Attitude That Makes Children Over Dependent
1. You cook their food for them so that they can read and enjoy it.
2. You help them to wash their clothes and tidy their rooms.
3. You drop them off at school every day by yourself!
4. You lie on their behalf to get them out of trouble.
5. You arrange “expo” to help them pass their exams.
6. You protect them from every danger and difficulty.
7. You prevent them from any form of pain and suffering.
8. You hustle around while they watch films and play games.
9. They can’t go out alone because you’re always scared.
10. You take every decision for them because you’re wiser.
11. You go to their schools to fight for them and prove their rights.
12. You defend them even when they’re wrong and at fault.
13. You cannot stand seeing them starve or go hungry for once.
14. You fight against those who try to correct them.
You probably think you are showing them love but you may be shocked that you are raising an over-dependent generation. The harm is that by the time you’re no longer there and they face real-life challenges, they will become helpless!!! At that stage, they will realize the havoc you have done on them
Parents need to be careful how they raise their children. Remember, parenting is a divine assignment and so, requires God’s wisdom to be able to succeed in the task of raising responsible children.
. WISDOM TIPS
1. Give your children age-appropriate domestic tasks, even if you have a thousand and one domestic servants at home. It is sheer ignorance to think that doing everything for your children is a mark of honour or a way of bequeathing royalty on them.
2. Teach them to be useful and make their impact felt positively wherever they are found starting from the home, in school, places of worship, or other places.
3. Encourage your children to always leave a good impression wherever they go; teach them to be courteous, respectful, friendly, cheerful and helpful.
4. Teach them good toilet manners – they must know how to keep the toilet neat for the next user, and let them know that it is unacceptable to leave the bathroom floor or walls messed with soap, foam, or any form of dirt after bathing.
5. Teach your children the importance of taking good care of their body and their environment; whether they are at home or elsewhere. Remind them that responsible people don’t leave their rooms unkempt or their bed unmade when they get up in the morning; teach them to take their bath very well and smell fine always. you; let them take care of their armpits, teeth, hair and nails.
6. Teach your children to manage their used clothes and other personal belongings very well, whether in their home or elsewhere. It can be irritating to have dirty clothes or shoes, especially those of a visitor litter every corner of the house.
7. Let them pack their toiletries before leaving home. Your children should not depend on their hosts for their basic toiletries such as soap, cream, tooth paste and other essentials.
8. Teach your children to dress well all the time, especially when they are spending time with another family. You probably allow your daughters to dress in bum shots and your sons to walk about with their chest bare in your home, but they may not be safe if they do so in another place. You may not know where a predator would lie in wait for a child.
9. Teach them good table manners; not the ones recited in nursery schools rhymes. Teach them to chew with their mouth covered, not to make noise with the cutlery on their teeth, not to talk with their mouth full, etc.
10. Let your children know that washing only their own plates after eating is not a noble idea.
11. Remind your children that jumping into a conversation when adults are talking is a sign of being ill-mannered. Discourage this both in your home and elsewhere and do not hesitate to scold them for any act of misbehaviour.
12. Help your children not to be social birds online and anti-social bugs offline. They should relate well with people around them, much more than they do with virtual folks they meet online. Please, discourage this idea of young people locking themselves in the room for hours on end without communicating with anyone in the house – all because they are on phone.
13. Empower your children to uphold your family values wherever they are. But before then, make sure that your family values are credible, empowering, socially and morally beneficial.
14. Teach your children to control their appetite and learn to turn down certain offers, even when such offers come from people they know. And at home, it is not compulsory that they must taste everything they see someone eating. This will help them to take their eyes away from certain things when they are in other people’s homes.
15. Always remind your children that they are the window through which the world sees you. If your children’s behavior outside is bad, the general consensus is that they lack home training. And since children are not meant to give themselves home training, it means that you failed as a parent.
16. Finally, make sure your children know God. Salvation is not hereditary; that you are Godly or highly spiritual is not a guarantee that your children are saved. You must consciously and deliberately lead them to God.
Let us try our best to make sure these children represent us well. I am sure you will feel good if you come to your children’s school and people are pointing at you as the parent of the best-behaved child in the school. Won’t you?
Make sure your hosts and the hosts of your children are always impressed to have you or your children around.
May God, The Almighty make our children responsible and successful, Amen!
The vitality of the internet and digital devices warrants that children are kept abreast of modern innovations and relevant gadgets.
However, parents and teachers should see it as duty to guide their children towards positive use of internet and digital devices.
The Zonal Director, Federal Radio Corporation of Nigeria, FRCN, Ibadan National Station, Mrs Bolatito Joseph stated this at this year Children’s Day party organized by Amuludun 99.1 FM, Moniya, Ibadan.
Mrs Bolatito Joseph represented by the Deputy Director Audit, Alhaji Abdul Rasheed Akande explained that many benefits could be derived from the internet to enhance learning, but this benefit might be lost if the internet is put to negative use.
Earlier, in a welcome address, The General Manager, Amuludun FM, Mr Steven Agbaje said the programme was organized to extend love to the children and make them have sense of belonging.
Three of the children, Zamad Mariam, Muhammed Bolaji and Ahmed Fatai expressed their delight on the programme.
Parents and teachers expressed happiness and thanked Management of Amuludun FM for organizing the programme.
Children’s Day is marked annually on May 27.
Similarly, it was funfair on Friday, at the Broadcasting House of Radio Nigeria Gold FM, Ilesha, where children gathered to celebrate this year’s children’s day.
Addressing the children from different schools, who were at the event, General manager Gold FM, Mr Adedamola Tinubu advised the to be obedient, and face their studies squarely, to attain greatness.
Describing children as the future of the Nation, he promised that, Radio Nigeria would continue to promote Programmes on welfare and right of children in the society.
Some children who spoke with Radio Nigeria, appreciated Gold FM for organizing such a memorable event, saying that they had so much fun.
Earlier, the Royal Father, present at the event had prayed for the children for excellent spirit.
Highlights of the event include : dancing, competition, quiz and track event.
Some Stakeholders have appealed to government at all levels and relevant agencies not to pay lip service to the welfare of every Nigerian child.
They made the appeal while speaking with Radio Nigeria on the plight of children in commemoration of this year’s Children’s Day.
Oyo State coordinator, Child’s Protection Network, Mrs Oluwatoyin Ogedengbe said laws for the welfare and protection of children will remain ineffective if government fails to implement them.
Mrs Ogedengbe, who commended the Oyo State Government for the establishment of family court, said more still needed to be done for children.
A lecturer at the University of Ibadan, Dr Oluwakemi Aremu decried the poor state of education and infrastructure decay in primary schools, calling for safe environment for children to thrive.
Also speaking on the day, Headmaster, I.D.C basic school, Ibadan, Mr Olaolu Adegoke challenged teachers, parents and guidance to re-double their efforts at raising children in a conducive environment.
Meanwhile, in commemoration of the day, the Oyo state Child Protection Network sensitized the pupils on the Child Rights Law and health related matters
Similarly, Osun State Governor, Mr Adegboyega Oyetola has urged parents and guardians to perform their roles as expected to ensure a glorious future for every Nigerian child.
Represented by the Head of Service, Dr Olowogboyega Oyebade, Governor, Oyetola expressed the need for parents and guardians to inculcate the values of honesty,, dedication and love for their nation in children..
Governnor Oyetola assured the children of government’s commitment to continuously protect their rights and sustain every obligation to ensure their well being.
Earlier in a welcome address, Commissioner Ministry of Women, Children and Social Affairs, Barrister Mrs Bukola Olaboopo had stressed the need to treat children’s affairs with utmost seriousness to guarantee them good living.
Radio Nigeria correspondent reports that the celebration was characterized by match past by school children, special rendition and presentation of gifts to best performing schools in the march past.
Veteran Nollywood actor, Adebayo Salami, popularly known as Oga Bello, was moved to tears as his children gifted him a Toyota SUV for his 70th birthday,on Monday.
His actor son, Femi Adebayo, shared the moment on his Instagram page, where his father was flanked by family and friends during presentation.
One of the children, also a Nollywood actor, Femi noted that, his father never cried, but he couldn’t hold his emotions as he received the gift.
“I’ve always known my Dad to be a disciplinarian. My Daddy never cries but today, he couldn’t hold the emotions. I couldn’t also hold mine honestly.
“I’m so grateful to Almighty God that Daddy could see this day and he made it possible for us to deliver this gift. Happy 70th Daddy, we love you,” Femi wrote.
Australia’s medical regulator, the Therapeutic Goods Administration, TGA, said on Thursday that it has provisionally approved the Moderna COVID-19 vaccine for use in individuals aged six years and older.
According to the report, the decision follows the provisional approvals granted by the TGA to Moderna for the use of the vaccine, SPIKEVAX, in individuals aged 12 years and older in September 2021.
The TGA said in a statement, “As for other age groups, the use of this vaccine in children aged six to 11 years should be administered as two doses at least 28 days apart.
It said a lower dose of 0.25 mL 50 micrograms will be given to children six to 11 years, compared to the 0.5 ml, 100 micrograms, dose used for those 12 years and older.
SPIKEVAX has now been added to Pfizer’s coronavirus vaccine as the recommended vaccine for Australian children.
Parents and guardians have been advised to effectively monitor their wards in order to compliment teachers’ efforts towards instilling education and moral values in them. The executive chairman, Ibadan North West, Alhaji Rahman Adepoju gave the advice during the final stage of the 2022 Schools Challenge quiz competition for public primary schools at the local government secretariat, Onireke, Ibadan. Alhaji Adepoju, who pointed out that the programme which was a follow up to the distribution of exercise books and compendium to primary school pupils last year, said the event was to prepare the primary school pupils for future challenges.
Alhaji Adepoju explained that the quiz competition would be extended to include private primary schools across the local government in line with the educational policy of Governor Seyi Makinde’s administration, calling on teachers to justify good gestures to the education sector in the state. In a motivational speech, an actress and cultural ambassador, Mrs Toyin Adegbola advised pupils to keep good company, focus on their studies and be determined to become great in life, while calling on parents to speak Yoruba language to their children as a way of promoting culture. In another presentation, a retired teacher, Mrs Alice Arowodasa encouraged parents not to relent in their efforts to ensure good children upbringing and commended Alhaji Adepoju’s initiative to showcase competitive spirit in students for excellence. Four primary school pupils, Misses Confidence Festus of Army Children School II came first, Ebube Joseph of the Army Children School III came second, Ayomide Akinferede of the United Native of Africa Primary School came third and Joy David of the Saviour Apostolic School I came fourth among the forty-one public primary schools which participated in the quiz competition. Highlights of the event were the presentation of certificates and educational instruction materials to the winners and participating school pupils.
Public health promoters and educators in the University of Ibadan have stressed the need for parents to ensure adequate provision of balanced diet for their children to prevent bacteria conjunctivitis leading to visual impairment.
Speaking on behalf of the public health promotion and education students during a public health intervention held at the Cathedral of Saint David, Kudeti, Ibadan, the team leader, Mr Augustine Adugbe said predicament relating to vision in children aside being hereditory could be induced by malnutrition.
Mr Adugbe who said the choice of Kudeti for the medical intervention followed prevalence of treatable diseases as well as poverty level of residents in the area.
Other experts including an optalmologists, Patrick Okafor and medical laboratory scientist, Elizabeth Bolarinwa said patients with cases of bacteria conjuctivis, aggravated high blood pressure and malaria were discovered and administered drugs to prevent worsen health crises.
In an interview with Radio Nigeria, the Sub dean, Cathedral of Saint David, Kudeti, Venerable Engineer Oluseye Ogunrinde said most communities in oyo state as well as many residents lacked the resources for their medical upkeep.
Venerable Ogunrinde challenged corporate organizations and institutions to incorporate social responsibility policy into their annual programme and implement them in communities with visible social and economic challenges.
The Clerk, ECOWAS Female Parliamentarians Association, Mrs. Blessing Samuel-Atiri says the Economic Community of West African States has established a regional partnership to address the phenomenon of Street Children in the sub-region.
Speaking on “Street Children”, a Radio Nigeria, network programme, Mrs. Samuel-Atiri who relayed her experience on the streets as a child, said the partnership would include civil society organisations, religious and traditional rulers across the region to squarely identify core issues and create awareness on the plights of street children. “We are talking about the insurgency in the country, the sub-region, and street children is the breeding ground for all of these”, she said.
Mrs Samuel-Atiri further stressed the need for technical and vocational education in the region to meet the current demand for creativity and innovation.
Another guest on the programme and the Chief Security Officer (CSO), ECOWAS Parliament Mr Kamba Aliyu who also shared his experience as a street child with the quest for education, advised the government to create a conducive and favourable atmosphere for education and equally intensify sensitisation on the importance of education.
Some Nigerians who called into the programme want government and civil society organisations to collaborate to take children off the streets and provide social welfare services for them.
Sexual maladaptive behaviour is defined as an abnormal pattern of acting out in sexual manners that are grossly out of proportion to normal development.
When sex, especially rape, is introduced to children at a very young age, it begins to cause certain behaviours in these children this is now known as sexual maladaptive behaviour.
It is a type of behaviour that puts the child’s physical, mental and emotional well-being at risk and also the safety of those who surround the child.
Although, some sexual behaviours in a child could be harmless as it could be a form of self-exploration, but this behaviour becomes maladaptive when it causes social impairment, disruption in daily activities, physical and emotional discomfort to the child and also to others.
There are various and several causes of sexual maladaptive behaviour but one which is very common is sexual molestation and child rape.
Many children who display these acts have been or are still victims of sexual abuse, molestation and rape.
They have been molested sexually by older people and people who in one way or the other, have a close relationship with.
Also, children are exposed to these behaviours through social media movies, internet and their environment.
Environmental factor plays a very important role in the development of a child.
Some of the symptoms that are commonly neglected includes when a child blatantly ignores rules, disregards figures of authority, display aggressive behaviours, touching the genitals of animals, exposing oneself in public settings and making crude movements with their bodies.
It is very advisable for parents, guardians and teachers to pay immediate attention and treatment to children with such behaviours as to avoid making it become a long term addiction.
Sexual maladaptive behaviours does not just affect the child physically but also psychologically.
Such children are very liable to have anxiety disorders, communication and learning issues and anti-social disorders.
Parents should henceforth learn to monitor their children and keen attention should be given to the kind of movies they watch, the things they say and the clothes they wear.
Also schools, who have such children in their custody should not relegate such children but should create a forum that will help, such as extra lessons and paying undivided attention to them and also educate them about sexual maladaptive behaviours.
The media should also organise programmes that educate parents and children on the behaviours exhibited.
As we all know that rape affects victims negatively both physically and emotionally, rapists should not be spared but brought to book.
Also parents or guardians of a victim should as a matter of importance, apart from seeking medical attention for the victims, take the victims to psychologists to cleanse any psychological distress.
